Ask Miss Lisa
- Nov 4, 2022
- 3 min read

Finally Free!

Ask Miss Lisa (Love, Inspiration, Straight-talk, Activation)

If TODAY is THE day…

I spent my 57th birthday on a cruise to the Bahamas. This time last year I was recovering from my stem cell transplant and my subsequent three-week hospital stay. The trip was a gift from my daughter from another mother. We were both celebrating our “Libra Birthdays!” and I did all I could do to prepare for the trip, getting my nails done and packing just the “right” outfits.

On the first morning of the cruise, I realized that two of my toes were completely naked of the very expensive, gel nail polish from the pedicure I received for my birthday present from my oldest daughter for this birthday trip. The “pre-cancer” Lisa would have lost her natural mind and would have focused so much on the missing toenail polish that it would have significantly affected the outcome of my trip. The “old” me would have obsessed so much over not having those toes polished that it may have almost ruined my trip, but now I am FINALLY FREE from caring what other people THINK and STRESSING OUT over NOTHING!!!

I have finally come to the realization that in the grand scheme of life…and after believing I was going to die last year from cancer…none of that small stuff matters at all! I wasted so much time in my pre-cancer life worrying about getting or making EVERYTHING as close to “perfect” as possible and that is time I will NEVER get back.

Being “finally free” to me means that I consistently focus on the things in life that make me happy and doing those things with the people who celebrate me, and our time spent together. We may have been raised to care what everyone around us thinks. We are taught to “play our part” and we care so much about what other people “might” think or say, that we forget about our own wants, hopes and dreams and we learn to shove our personal thoughts and desires to the bottom of the list.

One of the issues with living trying to please other people is that their thoughts, needs and wants are constantly changing and we can never keep up. As soon as we think we have mastered one unrealistic expectation, the person changes his or her mind and now what we thought they wanted is yesterday’s news. Trying to keep up with the folks on social media and trying to do and make things “perfect” is an unrealistic waste of time. I can remember always wanting everything to be “perfect” and to “always look perfect” and I know for a fact that I drove my family crazy and eventually made myself sick.

We spend so much time worrying about what others might think or say about us that we stress and obsess over the small stuff…and it is ALL small stuff in the big picture we call life. We work ourselves crazy to get “things” and we don’t take enough time to realize that most of us have more than enough “stuff” to support a few families. We want people to think our homes are perfect…our lives are perfect…our relationships are perfect and that we have IT all together.

I would like to suggest that we stop trying to please other people and figure out what makes us happy and…do that!! No matter what other people think. Let’s stop worrying if every hair is in place and or if every toenail is polished (so silly!) and start focusing on what truly feeds our souls.

You only get one life…stop wasting it on the small stuff…Let's start enjoying our REAL lives!

Don't waste your life trying to be perfect. Learn to live a life that is perfect for you and the people you love who celebrate and enjoy the REAL you!

I am FINALLY FREE to love and enjoy just being ME…unpainted toenails and all!